i feel pretty certain that i can imagine something and it can be as powerful as a memory.
i also believe that a memory is about as important as an imagination.
it is intangible.
it is not "reality."
it is not destined to impact my life. right here. right now.
john lennon encouraged us to picture life without its various hang-ups or trappings.
can you?
what would life look like without...
racism
consumerism
materialism
bullying
snobbery?
this isn't some call to socialism.
i just think we can use what isn't "real" to move us. impact us.
change us.
your scale can be individual, cosmic, or anything in between.
there is power in that place, no doubt about it.
we can harness this power.
use it to help others, improve life, better the planet, bring change where it's needed.
imagine that.
Tuesday, December 11, 2012
Monday, December 10, 2012
watercolor ponies and godspeed
This weekend, I attended the funeral of a little baby boy who lived all of two hours. His little life was a BIG life that impacted me personally on a number of levels. And even his farewell moved me. The love his parents shared and grace displayed was touching, inspiring and POWERFUL! How many of us strive to make a big difference only to have our efforts hampered by things like stress, time limitations and money? And yet, this baby came into this world, lived here for two hours and effortless changed lives.
Furthermore, I was moved and inspired by his parents. She'd been blogging about her pregnancy. This baby boy, her firstborn of the two, was a twin. His brother is healthy and thriving at home. This mother shared with a watching world as she prepared for what most of us can only imagine would be the most painful and difficult thing to ever endure. Her story will stay with me forever!
Sometimes, I worry my own boys don't have the mother they deserve. My voice isn't super sweet and I don't naturally baby them. I LOVE them with all the love I have. I also would and will do ANYTHING for them to be safe, to know they are loved, and to help them grow into the kind of men this world needs.
My hope is that I can show them grace and love in the face of whatever life brings our way. Should my oldest decide to leave our nest for college (that's his plan!), already he is more than halfway to that age. And that haunts my heart to no end! My husband and I sometimes look at each other and shake our heads when it hits us that they're truly growing up every single... single... day. We say, "Oh, those Watercolor Ponies," referencing an old song by Christian artist, Wayne Watson. (*You can look this song up on YouTube, too. The words are precious.)
Here is a link to the song played at the very end of Baby John's funeral. Godspeed, baby boy.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VqaBof47pmY
Furthermore, I was moved and inspired by his parents. She'd been blogging about her pregnancy. This baby boy, her firstborn of the two, was a twin. His brother is healthy and thriving at home. This mother shared with a watching world as she prepared for what most of us can only imagine would be the most painful and difficult thing to ever endure. Her story will stay with me forever!
Sometimes, I worry my own boys don't have the mother they deserve. My voice isn't super sweet and I don't naturally baby them. I LOVE them with all the love I have. I also would and will do ANYTHING for them to be safe, to know they are loved, and to help them grow into the kind of men this world needs.
My hope is that I can show them grace and love in the face of whatever life brings our way. Should my oldest decide to leave our nest for college (that's his plan!), already he is more than halfway to that age. And that haunts my heart to no end! My husband and I sometimes look at each other and shake our heads when it hits us that they're truly growing up every single... single... day. We say, "Oh, those Watercolor Ponies," referencing an old song by Christian artist, Wayne Watson. (*You can look this song up on YouTube, too. The words are precious.)
Here is a link to the song played at the very end of Baby John's funeral. Godspeed, baby boy.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VqaBof47pmY
it's a pretty wonderful life...
When I'm managing umpires' payrolls, running my kids to their activities, organizing homeroom parents, taking a load to Goodwill or walking the dog... in my mind, I often hear that line from "It's A Wonderful Life" about the main character (George) who "stays behind (from war) and fights the battle of Bedford Falls."
In so many ways, such is my life.
Now, if I didn't appreciate this movie or love George Bailey (and the actor who portrays him, James Stewart), I might see this as an insult. But in truth, there is something to be said for those of us who fight these battles, manage these homefronts and tend to our "troops."
So, this blog is in appreciation of and a cheers to:
*You moms who sew buttons on shirts, make lunches each day or run errands for everyone else in the household...
*You dads and husbands who work less-than-glamorous or dirty jobs day in and day out, with little respect from the boss...
*You teens and young adults who take out the garbage, visit your Grandparents, teach kids at church or watch your younger siblings for your parents...
*You educators who make a big deal out of things like teaching kids the true value of recycling...
*You parent coaches who desire to teach our children good sportsmanship in addition to how to hit a curve ball...
To all who will never perform on a world stage, or visit other parts of the world, for that matter...
As we get ready to see another year come to an end, may each of you feel within yourself a sense of purpose, accomplishment and gratitude for the opportunity daily to say, "Good job, self. Well done!"
In so many ways, such is my life.
Now, if I didn't appreciate this movie or love George Bailey (and the actor who portrays him, James Stewart), I might see this as an insult. But in truth, there is something to be said for those of us who fight these battles, manage these homefronts and tend to our "troops."
So, this blog is in appreciation of and a cheers to:
*You moms who sew buttons on shirts, make lunches each day or run errands for everyone else in the household...
*You dads and husbands who work less-than-glamorous or dirty jobs day in and day out, with little respect from the boss...
*You teens and young adults who take out the garbage, visit your Grandparents, teach kids at church or watch your younger siblings for your parents...
*You educators who make a big deal out of things like teaching kids the true value of recycling...
*You parent coaches who desire to teach our children good sportsmanship in addition to how to hit a curve ball...
To all who will never perform on a world stage, or visit other parts of the world, for that matter...
As we get ready to see another year come to an end, may each of you feel within yourself a sense of purpose, accomplishment and gratitude for the opportunity daily to say, "Good job, self. Well done!"
Friday, December 7, 2012
one week to go!
The lack of "clutter" in my mind lately hasn't made life less busy. And by clutter, I mean the unnecessary things I am unwittingly subjected to on a daily basis when I am not alert. But it's more than this. Doing without has brought clarity. I've gone without any medicine (the occasional Advil), texting beyond what is necessary, Facebook and food on certain days. It's been slightly challenging and extremely refreshing. I've reconsidered friendships, activities, people, etc. But boy, have I still made mistakes! The clarity has NOT made me "better" or taken away my faults... in fact, I see them more clearly than perhaps ever before!
I think I'll take such a respite more often going forward.
For now, I am one week away from completing my little two-week hiatus. This coming week is busier than last week. Still, I'm ready to focus, do what I've gotta do, be where I get to be, and challenge myself in some harder workouts than I've done in a while.
Here we go!!!
I think I'll take such a respite more often going forward.
For now, I am one week away from completing my little two-week hiatus. This coming week is busier than last week. Still, I'm ready to focus, do what I've gotta do, be where I get to be, and challenge myself in some harder workouts than I've done in a while.
Here we go!!!
Monday, December 3, 2012
fear
Fear is familiar. At times, what is familiar can be the most scary thing to imagine. When you've faced abuse, disappointment, or any other affliction -- especially from those you love and who are supposed to love you -- it isn't fear of the unknown that rattles your core. It's the familiar fears that keep you up at night and zap your peace.
When searching your soul for inner peace, sometimes the best times to practice or start are when you are most scared... scared of what might be coming, scared to once again face the fear, scared of the big bad monster who might be parent, spouse, or child.
Try to EMBRACE WHAT YOU MUST FACE, even if it turns out to be nothing. If you find yourself with a stomach in knots and your nerves on edge, sit and pray/meditate and seek quiet amid the chaos that has once again taken over your mind and spirit. If you are actively searching for answers to what you should do long-term with regard to this fear, a place of quiet and calm is a fitting place for that journey, too.
All that talk about what doesn't kill you only makes you stronger can have real impact when you face what you fear most and prepare yourself with peace. We all know we can't control other people and their actions. We also can't control weather, technology (as far as it being 100 percent reliable) or what life tragedies might befall us at any given moment.
We CAN control our inner peace level. At times of fear and dread, seek peace within. You owe yourself some moments of quiet and sanctuary when a potential life storm is brewing.
When searching your soul for inner peace, sometimes the best times to practice or start are when you are most scared... scared of what might be coming, scared to once again face the fear, scared of the big bad monster who might be parent, spouse, or child.
Try to EMBRACE WHAT YOU MUST FACE, even if it turns out to be nothing. If you find yourself with a stomach in knots and your nerves on edge, sit and pray/meditate and seek quiet amid the chaos that has once again taken over your mind and spirit. If you are actively searching for answers to what you should do long-term with regard to this fear, a place of quiet and calm is a fitting place for that journey, too.
All that talk about what doesn't kill you only makes you stronger can have real impact when you face what you fear most and prepare yourself with peace. We all know we can't control other people and their actions. We also can't control weather, technology (as far as it being 100 percent reliable) or what life tragedies might befall us at any given moment.
We CAN control our inner peace level. At times of fear and dread, seek peace within. You owe yourself some moments of quiet and sanctuary when a potential life storm is brewing.
Sunday, December 2, 2012
two weeks...
to ponder:
spiritual
mental
physical
emotional
there isn't a reason to ponder the intellectual. this is who i am. who i strive and want to be. THE side i would want to be most. most identified with. most acknowledged as.
this is me.
my spiritual changes. always wants to be good. doesn't desire controversy. is slightly afraid of what is unknown but isn't afraid to grow, learn, see.
my mental isn't what i thought it was. i am sane, have my wits, keep the balance. but in maturity, i am not always mentally where perhaps i should be.
physically, i am always wanting. hungrier than i should be. sleepy. lazy. but i am strong. healthy. capable. now i must be disciplined. better. faster.
emotionally. i am a wreck. i deny. i haven't accepted. i am not as emotionless as i would have hoped. i am moved. swayed. emotional. more so than i care to acknowledge.
for two weeks:
no FB
no tipsiness
no turning away from painful truths
no medicine
no seeking attention
for two weeks:
meditation
facing the uncomfortable memories
eyes. wide. open.
working. moving.
reading and feeding my mind.
looking inside and beyond. and back inside.
for two weeks i am 40. and then another year. and ever my seconds closer to death. to the end of me.
but until then... life. all i need and want and dare for it to be.
two weeks to ponder, prepare and push.
spiritual
mental
physical
emotional
there isn't a reason to ponder the intellectual. this is who i am. who i strive and want to be. THE side i would want to be most. most identified with. most acknowledged as.
this is me.
my spiritual changes. always wants to be good. doesn't desire controversy. is slightly afraid of what is unknown but isn't afraid to grow, learn, see.
my mental isn't what i thought it was. i am sane, have my wits, keep the balance. but in maturity, i am not always mentally where perhaps i should be.
physically, i am always wanting. hungrier than i should be. sleepy. lazy. but i am strong. healthy. capable. now i must be disciplined. better. faster.
emotionally. i am a wreck. i deny. i haven't accepted. i am not as emotionless as i would have hoped. i am moved. swayed. emotional. more so than i care to acknowledge.
for two weeks:
no FB
no tipsiness
no turning away from painful truths
no medicine
no seeking attention
for two weeks:
meditation
facing the uncomfortable memories
eyes. wide. open.
working. moving.
reading and feeding my mind.
looking inside and beyond. and back inside.
for two weeks i am 40. and then another year. and ever my seconds closer to death. to the end of me.
but until then... life. all i need and want and dare for it to be.
two weeks to ponder, prepare and push.
Wednesday, March 21, 2012
the David Decade...
Let me tell you some of what I've learned in 10 years since becoming a mother, compliments of my firstborn son, David. If I had to describe him in one word... well, I couldn't. He is too many wonderful and varied things. So I'll tell you what he's brought to my life and what he's shown me in this past decade...
1. A child can demonstrate extreme compassion for others, even if their life experiences are limited. I've never seen a boy tear-up like my son at the sight of someone else's pain. He might be the most kind-hearted person I've ever known.
2. Who knew that all my childhood goofiness -- like making myself laugh at made-up sounds and words -- could be replicated in another human being?
3. From his entrance into the world, David has had his own outlook on life. I don't know if I ever knew what the term "old soul" meant until I met him. He didn't cry for his first few days... too many thoughts on his new surroundings, I imagine.
4. All thoughts of what a little boy "should be" were thrown out long ago as I grew and learned TRULY to love someone for WHO THEY ARE. He digs science and trivia more than baseball and cars, that's for sure.
5. I didn't know that a young person's brain could retain and comprehend complex ideas until David started talking, which he didn't really do until around age 4. He literally has taught me about time-space theory, black holes and dark energy, among many other things.
6. I've decided there is a LOT more to nature (rather than nurture) when it comes to someone's personality and identity. My son gravitates toward what HE loves and what HIS interests are. Even as the rest of us are swaying in a different direction, David seems incapable of being anything but his truest self. I pray he never loses this amazing trait!
7. At times, I wanted him to "act his age" a little more... but in recent years, I've been so grateful that he still lets himself be vulnerable with me. My youngest son is beyond his britches at times, particularly in his speech and reasoning. This drives me nuts because basically he is too much like me in this way. So when David still wants to cuddle or when he fumbles words... well, it just means he needs me a little bit longer.
8. His loyalty to family and friends is fierce. He could teach some adults a thing or two about loving unconditionally, putting family first and making time for those you love.
9. Just when I think he is timid and unsure, David blows me away with his tenacious spirit and drive to be better at something. He definitely loves to relax, but he isn't afraid to push himself.
10. There was a time when I thought my son might have autism or Asperger's. Even today, his dexterity is lacking and he is funny about smells and textures. Sometimes, he still can't tie his shoes or stay focused for more than a few seconds. But I wouldn't change him one bit. David's comprehension is beyond me and his ear for music is impressive. He has one of the most brilliant minds I've ever had the pleasure of knowing. What a formidable challenge I have to serve as his mother and do his life justice.
1. A child can demonstrate extreme compassion for others, even if their life experiences are limited. I've never seen a boy tear-up like my son at the sight of someone else's pain. He might be the most kind-hearted person I've ever known.
2. Who knew that all my childhood goofiness -- like making myself laugh at made-up sounds and words -- could be replicated in another human being?
3. From his entrance into the world, David has had his own outlook on life. I don't know if I ever knew what the term "old soul" meant until I met him. He didn't cry for his first few days... too many thoughts on his new surroundings, I imagine.
4. All thoughts of what a little boy "should be" were thrown out long ago as I grew and learned TRULY to love someone for WHO THEY ARE. He digs science and trivia more than baseball and cars, that's for sure.
5. I didn't know that a young person's brain could retain and comprehend complex ideas until David started talking, which he didn't really do until around age 4. He literally has taught me about time-space theory, black holes and dark energy, among many other things.
6. I've decided there is a LOT more to nature (rather than nurture) when it comes to someone's personality and identity. My son gravitates toward what HE loves and what HIS interests are. Even as the rest of us are swaying in a different direction, David seems incapable of being anything but his truest self. I pray he never loses this amazing trait!
7. At times, I wanted him to "act his age" a little more... but in recent years, I've been so grateful that he still lets himself be vulnerable with me. My youngest son is beyond his britches at times, particularly in his speech and reasoning. This drives me nuts because basically he is too much like me in this way. So when David still wants to cuddle or when he fumbles words... well, it just means he needs me a little bit longer.
8. His loyalty to family and friends is fierce. He could teach some adults a thing or two about loving unconditionally, putting family first and making time for those you love.
9. Just when I think he is timid and unsure, David blows me away with his tenacious spirit and drive to be better at something. He definitely loves to relax, but he isn't afraid to push himself.
10. There was a time when I thought my son might have autism or Asperger's. Even today, his dexterity is lacking and he is funny about smells and textures. Sometimes, he still can't tie his shoes or stay focused for more than a few seconds. But I wouldn't change him one bit. David's comprehension is beyond me and his ear for music is impressive. He has one of the most brilliant minds I've ever had the pleasure of knowing. What a formidable challenge I have to serve as his mother and do his life justice.
Thursday, March 8, 2012
March Family Focus... bring on the 'Net!
The little paper drawn for March from our family focus choices says, "Website, Blogging, Networking." I wasn't really prepared for this one but we marched right in, so to speak.
I don't anticipate letting my kids open Facebook accounts (like they'd be able to just STOP cold turkey at the end of the month), but we plan to open a blog account for them to post their own "news" (family photos and happenings, among other things). This might actually serve as a great outlet for them. Dylan loves to write and David loves to share information and, I think, has dreams of being famous!
Last week, my 9-year-old also got into "programming," thanks to a book David checked out from one of the Austin libraries for him. His focus doesn't always stay in tact, but he does seem to enjoy computer programming, at least at this early stage.
I look forward to seeing where March leads us. Everything's turning to bats and diamonds around here, so a little Internet focus should serve as a needed distraction from time to time.
I don't anticipate letting my kids open Facebook accounts (like they'd be able to just STOP cold turkey at the end of the month), but we plan to open a blog account for them to post their own "news" (family photos and happenings, among other things). This might actually serve as a great outlet for them. Dylan loves to write and David loves to share information and, I think, has dreams of being famous!
Last week, my 9-year-old also got into "programming," thanks to a book David checked out from one of the Austin libraries for him. His focus doesn't always stay in tact, but he does seem to enjoy computer programming, at least at this early stage.
I look forward to seeing where March leads us. Everything's turning to bats and diamonds around here, so a little Internet focus should serve as a needed distraction from time to time.
Wednesday, February 29, 2012
February Family Focus... NEW PLACES!
This month, my family and I were determined to visit some new places for our monthly FAMILY FOCUS! I would say that while we did indeed take in a few new spots, we weren't particularly adventurous in this area. And we're an adventurous family! We've been a little distracted over here as we adjust to life with Daddy at the office full-time. Probably more than any of us realize or care to admit, this has impacted life in the Lopez home in a big way. We miss our Papa Bear when he isn't here to share his love, his hugs, his enthusiasm and his encouragement. He is our team captain and sometimes, we just want him home with us!
But NEW PLACES was our focus for February. Every time we experienced a new place, everyone was quick to make note of it. Even though we didn't do a lot of things that I hoped we'd do (namely, museums and parks we've yet to discover), we still had that train of thought going and I think that is part of what makes a family activity work... just being on the same page with one another.
No surprise that RESTAURANTS topped our list! We visited four new places and I think the kids' favorite was Kobe Steakhouse. They were happy to have a Benihana-type replacement; I'm always so surprised at how enthusiastic these somewhat picky eaters are at places like this... David tried everything... from the mushroom soup to the grilled zucchini. As with Benihana, he liked it all. I think watching the chef brings the foods to life for them and they can appreciate the work that goes into the meal. We also enjoyed a new BBQ place (Cartwright's BBQ). We're such carnivores.
Since February was Oscar month and we'd set out to watch all of the BEST MOVIE nominees, the boys were able to visit two new movie theatres. They seemed to really like the unique feel of The Regal Arbor. We watched "The Artist" there and it gave us the opportunity to talk about the genre of independent films. It was a really wonderful time and I was reminded how grateful I am that we're raising our kids and they're with us pretty much ALL THE TIME (except when we're in Waco, of course). Sure we could use some more date nights, but I am so glad that we're making so many memories with our boys as they're growing up.
Finally, we attended my niece's birthday party at a jumping place called Jumping Beans out in Round Rock this past weekend. One jumping place is pretty much like the next, but they had lots of fun and we were able to cap off the month with a new place.
Baseball is now officially taking over! The boys have started practice, I'm working with new umpires and as soon as David comes home most days, it's outside to practice. I'm not sure what next month's family focus will be, but I intend to keep our family time a top priority despite everything else going on in our world.
But NEW PLACES was our focus for February. Every time we experienced a new place, everyone was quick to make note of it. Even though we didn't do a lot of things that I hoped we'd do (namely, museums and parks we've yet to discover), we still had that train of thought going and I think that is part of what makes a family activity work... just being on the same page with one another.
No surprise that RESTAURANTS topped our list! We visited four new places and I think the kids' favorite was Kobe Steakhouse. They were happy to have a Benihana-type replacement; I'm always so surprised at how enthusiastic these somewhat picky eaters are at places like this... David tried everything... from the mushroom soup to the grilled zucchini. As with Benihana, he liked it all. I think watching the chef brings the foods to life for them and they can appreciate the work that goes into the meal. We also enjoyed a new BBQ place (Cartwright's BBQ). We're such carnivores.
Since February was Oscar month and we'd set out to watch all of the BEST MOVIE nominees, the boys were able to visit two new movie theatres. They seemed to really like the unique feel of The Regal Arbor. We watched "The Artist" there and it gave us the opportunity to talk about the genre of independent films. It was a really wonderful time and I was reminded how grateful I am that we're raising our kids and they're with us pretty much ALL THE TIME (except when we're in Waco, of course). Sure we could use some more date nights, but I am so glad that we're making so many memories with our boys as they're growing up.
Finally, we attended my niece's birthday party at a jumping place called Jumping Beans out in Round Rock this past weekend. One jumping place is pretty much like the next, but they had lots of fun and we were able to cap off the month with a new place.
Baseball is now officially taking over! The boys have started practice, I'm working with new umpires and as soon as David comes home most days, it's outside to practice. I'm not sure what next month's family focus will be, but I intend to keep our family time a top priority despite everything else going on in our world.
Tuesday, January 31, 2012
family book club, the FINAL CHAPTER
Tonight we wrapped up our first month's focus for 2012, Family Book Club. We'd inadvertently decided that "without writing, there wouldn't be reading," to put it in my 7-year-old's words. He suggested last week that for our last Club meeting, we each bring an original piece to share with the group.
I was amazed! Impressed! Inspired! And thoroughly entertained! What a wonderful time of sharing, bonding and learning.
Dylan opened up the night's readings with his story, "The Puppy." His love of all things canine should have prepared us for his topic. His story was sweet, well written and flowed toward a happy ending. I was very impressed with the length and detail he put into his work. He had handwritten two full pages in a relatively short time span earlier this evening. But my guess is that he'd had the story in his head and heart for quite some time.
David, my 9-year-old, worked longer on his piece; he was the most nervous because writing doesn't come easily to him. But what a great job he did! His didn't have a title but he opened with a quote: "It is easy to see, but hard to foresee" -- Benjamin Franklin. He later revealed that he drew this from memory because his class takes in a "quote of the day" at school. (*I looked it up just now to find this from Franklin's Poor Richard's Almanack: "Tis easy to see, hard to foresee.") I was utterly inspired! In all my years of writing, I don't remember ever once opening with a quote. Wow! His was a tale of woe, about a scientist who'd convinced the world he had the cure for cancer, only to find out years later that his potion was venomous and deadly to the masses. He included a drawing of the cure's chemical structure at the end of his story. So awesome!
My story came next. I continued with a line of stories that I tell the boys once in a while at bedtime, loosely titled the D and D Adventures. They're stories about two brothers who both go by "D" (you're never certain which D is which) and they're various life lessons. Today's story was "Play Ball!"
My husband wowed us at the end with his short piece that I actually plan to post as a separate entry later today or tomorrow. It was really something special but I don't want to get into it too much and spoil the fun. We were so entertained and impressed... there were high-fives all around when we finished our Club meeting tonight.
We didn't always know exactly what we were going to do each week with our book club, but we definitely challenged ourselves and encouraged one another's creativity. January proved to be somewhat hectic at times, but we managed to stay on task with our monthly family focus. I'm excited as we look ahead to other monthly adventures. We've traded out New Sports/Workouts for Politics (for those who may have read earlier posts) because Politics is definitely something new for us around here. None of us are particularly "into" that scene. At the very least, we'll learn a thing or two about how the election process works.
And, because we just couldn't wait until tomorrow, we ending our time by drawing next month's focus from our 11 remaining topics... New Places! In February, we'll try and pack in visits to lots of new places from restaurants and museums to parks and cities we've yet to experience.
All in the name of family bonding and memory making!
I was amazed! Impressed! Inspired! And thoroughly entertained! What a wonderful time of sharing, bonding and learning.
Dylan opened up the night's readings with his story, "The Puppy." His love of all things canine should have prepared us for his topic. His story was sweet, well written and flowed toward a happy ending. I was very impressed with the length and detail he put into his work. He had handwritten two full pages in a relatively short time span earlier this evening. But my guess is that he'd had the story in his head and heart for quite some time.
David, my 9-year-old, worked longer on his piece; he was the most nervous because writing doesn't come easily to him. But what a great job he did! His didn't have a title but he opened with a quote: "It is easy to see, but hard to foresee" -- Benjamin Franklin. He later revealed that he drew this from memory because his class takes in a "quote of the day" at school. (*I looked it up just now to find this from Franklin's Poor Richard's Almanack: "Tis easy to see, hard to foresee.") I was utterly inspired! In all my years of writing, I don't remember ever once opening with a quote. Wow! His was a tale of woe, about a scientist who'd convinced the world he had the cure for cancer, only to find out years later that his potion was venomous and deadly to the masses. He included a drawing of the cure's chemical structure at the end of his story. So awesome!
My story came next. I continued with a line of stories that I tell the boys once in a while at bedtime, loosely titled the D and D Adventures. They're stories about two brothers who both go by "D" (you're never certain which D is which) and they're various life lessons. Today's story was "Play Ball!"
My husband wowed us at the end with his short piece that I actually plan to post as a separate entry later today or tomorrow. It was really something special but I don't want to get into it too much and spoil the fun. We were so entertained and impressed... there were high-fives all around when we finished our Club meeting tonight.
We didn't always know exactly what we were going to do each week with our book club, but we definitely challenged ourselves and encouraged one another's creativity. January proved to be somewhat hectic at times, but we managed to stay on task with our monthly family focus. I'm excited as we look ahead to other monthly adventures. We've traded out New Sports/Workouts for Politics (for those who may have read earlier posts) because Politics is definitely something new for us around here. None of us are particularly "into" that scene. At the very least, we'll learn a thing or two about how the election process works.
And, because we just couldn't wait until tomorrow, we ending our time by drawing next month's focus from our 11 remaining topics... New Places! In February, we'll try and pack in visits to lots of new places from restaurants and museums to parks and cities we've yet to experience.
All in the name of family bonding and memory making!
Friday, January 27, 2012
mountain time
In Jamaica, the term "island time" was all about taking it nice and slow, easy does it, and who needs a watch anyway?
In the mountains, time and again I've found that time doesn't seem to slow. There are no tides to watch or sand to run your toes through... there isn't a pulse of life to ponder just beneath the surface. Nothing here to pattern your heartbeat after, nothing to calm the noise like a mother's breath or soothing lullaby.
Mountain time seems not to be a slowing of time. Time seems to stop altogether. Completely.
For hours, the sun resides behind the giants who've called this place home longer than I can imagine. The clouds come and go, up and down the mountainsides but only for a little while. Angel fire might remind you to slow down and take a breath or two, but she's gone before you can grab your camera or a nearby loved one. She's a rogue visitor, and gone before she matters much.
The mountains stand unchanged, unmoved, unyielding in their power and strength. All you can do, really, is look at them. It's awe-inspiring to see their heights and know you could never just stroll on up there on a casual whim. These beasts aren't so easily taken. Their mysteries are ancient, hidden and not carelessly given away. Even a wind whisper from the glorious ranges don't tell the full story. Such rumors only tease and tempt the wandering soul.
For several minutes, at least, I took in their vastness. Sipping tea slows time, but sitting beneath a majestic mountain range blurs it all together... a seamless breath that can't be held or controlled. You can literally forget it's there, this requisite labor of mere mortals. So truly, time stands still. As do they.
I'm taking the day to enjoy stopped time. My much needed inner improvements will just have to wait. Wait for tomorrow... that is, assuming that time moves forward and tomorrow comes after all.
In the mountains, time and again I've found that time doesn't seem to slow. There are no tides to watch or sand to run your toes through... there isn't a pulse of life to ponder just beneath the surface. Nothing here to pattern your heartbeat after, nothing to calm the noise like a mother's breath or soothing lullaby.
Mountain time seems not to be a slowing of time. Time seems to stop altogether. Completely.
For hours, the sun resides behind the giants who've called this place home longer than I can imagine. The clouds come and go, up and down the mountainsides but only for a little while. Angel fire might remind you to slow down and take a breath or two, but she's gone before you can grab your camera or a nearby loved one. She's a rogue visitor, and gone before she matters much.
The mountains stand unchanged, unmoved, unyielding in their power and strength. All you can do, really, is look at them. It's awe-inspiring to see their heights and know you could never just stroll on up there on a casual whim. These beasts aren't so easily taken. Their mysteries are ancient, hidden and not carelessly given away. Even a wind whisper from the glorious ranges don't tell the full story. Such rumors only tease and tempt the wandering soul.
For several minutes, at least, I took in their vastness. Sipping tea slows time, but sitting beneath a majestic mountain range blurs it all together... a seamless breath that can't be held or controlled. You can literally forget it's there, this requisite labor of mere mortals. So truly, time stands still. As do they.
I'm taking the day to enjoy stopped time. My much needed inner improvements will just have to wait. Wait for tomorrow... that is, assuming that time moves forward and tomorrow comes after all.
Thursday, January 19, 2012
lopez family values
There are some changes going on in the Lopez household. Some dear friends reminded me recently that such is our time... our lifestyles are affected in ways I can't always understand but I do know that I hate to feel I am going backward. I grew up in a home where my parents were ever moving forward, and continue to do so today. They wanted and worked for "better" for us; who -- including me -- doesn't want that for their children?
It's been a while since I've had to be this aware of the dollars we spend and the way we make use of our resources. And in reality, this isn't a bad thing. For my personal life, I believe I always should be mindful of: what we're spending, how and where we're spending, what's coming in, what's going out, what can be let go, what we can share, what we can sell. I'm a minimalist, so why do I need three pairs of running shoes, especially since my running habit is sporadic at best?
Less meals out and more meals at home benefits us in MANY ways, but sometimes I don't like to cook. Sometimes eating out is just more "fun" or convenient. Or is it? Eating out means we each have to get dressed and out the door, which is sometimes easier said than done! Eating out means we have to choose a place with limited options; sometimes we are SO indecisive, it drives me nuts! Ultimately, eating out means we usually have to pay double or triple the amount of what it costs to eat at home.
Where I live is awesome. I love the people, the scenery, the schools. I wouldn't change it. But sometimes, just sometimes, I can get caught up in the "desperate housewives" of it all. Oh, how I love the women and fellow moms I've met. I'm not calling any of them desperate. I've met amazing, intelligent, generous, creative and loving housewives and working moms. But just because Mom X gets a manicure every week or has a maid or drives a *enter AWESOME car here*... just because these are the realities of some of the people around me, this may not be my reality. And that's more than OK. I've never been prone to jealousy, but I think it's easy to just SEE and WANT without even realizing it! Not only that, but these "things" are just that... THINGS. The REAL and GOOD stuff? Aw, man. I feel I have way beyond my portion in that area: healthy and brilliant and beautiful kids; an amazing, kind, patient, generous, hard-working genius of a husband; WONDERFUL friends, both here and where we're from (Waco); extended family always ready to help, support and give whatever we need. These "things" are the ingredients of a "good life," not the car, the mansion, the trips, the stuff. Not that I don't like a nice, new car or a fabulous handbag (boy, do I!), I just have to monitor where my eyes and thoughts and, ultimately, heart go.
These changes are good changes. Having to remind oneself of what matters most is GOOD. Evaluating my values is good for me and my family, as well as the world at large. I'm just another human on the planet, but today I am a more mindful human than I was a month ago. Today I am reminded to guard where I place true value and worth.
It's been a while since I've had to be this aware of the dollars we spend and the way we make use of our resources. And in reality, this isn't a bad thing. For my personal life, I believe I always should be mindful of: what we're spending, how and where we're spending, what's coming in, what's going out, what can be let go, what we can share, what we can sell. I'm a minimalist, so why do I need three pairs of running shoes, especially since my running habit is sporadic at best?
Less meals out and more meals at home benefits us in MANY ways, but sometimes I don't like to cook. Sometimes eating out is just more "fun" or convenient. Or is it? Eating out means we each have to get dressed and out the door, which is sometimes easier said than done! Eating out means we have to choose a place with limited options; sometimes we are SO indecisive, it drives me nuts! Ultimately, eating out means we usually have to pay double or triple the amount of what it costs to eat at home.
Where I live is awesome. I love the people, the scenery, the schools. I wouldn't change it. But sometimes, just sometimes, I can get caught up in the "desperate housewives" of it all. Oh, how I love the women and fellow moms I've met. I'm not calling any of them desperate. I've met amazing, intelligent, generous, creative and loving housewives and working moms. But just because Mom X gets a manicure every week or has a maid or drives a *enter AWESOME car here*... just because these are the realities of some of the people around me, this may not be my reality. And that's more than OK. I've never been prone to jealousy, but I think it's easy to just SEE and WANT without even realizing it! Not only that, but these "things" are just that... THINGS. The REAL and GOOD stuff? Aw, man. I feel I have way beyond my portion in that area: healthy and brilliant and beautiful kids; an amazing, kind, patient, generous, hard-working genius of a husband; WONDERFUL friends, both here and where we're from (Waco); extended family always ready to help, support and give whatever we need. These "things" are the ingredients of a "good life," not the car, the mansion, the trips, the stuff. Not that I don't like a nice, new car or a fabulous handbag (boy, do I!), I just have to monitor where my eyes and thoughts and, ultimately, heart go.
These changes are good changes. Having to remind oneself of what matters most is GOOD. Evaluating my values is good for me and my family, as well as the world at large. I'm just another human on the planet, but today I am a more mindful human than I was a month ago. Today I am reminded to guard where I place true value and worth.
Tuesday, January 17, 2012
family book club, TAKE 2
We just had our second family book club meeting. Dad and Mom sipped on beer and wine while the boys had water. Everyone shared a passage from their book of choice, then answered questions and took comments from the group. It was a wonderful time; all the while, Johann Sebastian Bach filled the quiet spaces with his magic. Wonderful!
My boys are getting so much out of this, even if they don't see it yet. I enjoyed hearing them read aloud; they still do this sometimes, but most reading around here is per individual. They took comments and questions with grace and confidence. And when it was the grown-ups' turn, I could see them paying attention before offering up their own insightful commentary and inquiries.
Whatever family time you choose to do, I encourage you to do it with all your heart and with a light-hearted approach. Keep expectations and distractions to a minimum. I'd also suggest keeping criticisms at bay. As our children learn to find and hear and share their own voices now, it might be easier to do this when they're older... when Mom and Dad aren't around to help drown out the noise of a big world that probably isn't as concerned about their reading prowess as I am.
My boys are getting so much out of this, even if they don't see it yet. I enjoyed hearing them read aloud; they still do this sometimes, but most reading around here is per individual. They took comments and questions with grace and confidence. And when it was the grown-ups' turn, I could see them paying attention before offering up their own insightful commentary and inquiries.
Whatever family time you choose to do, I encourage you to do it with all your heart and with a light-hearted approach. Keep expectations and distractions to a minimum. I'd also suggest keeping criticisms at bay. As our children learn to find and hear and share their own voices now, it might be easier to do this when they're older... when Mom and Dad aren't around to help drown out the noise of a big world that probably isn't as concerned about their reading prowess as I am.
family book club
January's focus in the Lopez home is called Family Book Club. Last week, we met over dinner at home and talked about the books we're reading, the authors of these books, and their topics. Getting the conversation on reading and books wasn't too hard because literature in all forms is a big part of life around here. My boys have been in a family book club since before they took in their first bit of air.
Dylan shared a little about Diary of a Wimpy kid. He's actually a "better" reader than this, but I'm letting them go with what they want in the moment. Reading is reading, right? My son David is working on his second Harry Potter book, while Dad is making his way through Telling Lies, a book about detecting deception. I chimed in about my first Stephen King novel, 11/22/63.
This week, we're each supposed to bring along and share a passage from our books and tell what impacted us or stood out about these. For my boys, it's a venture into new territory but I'm hopeful it will add to not only their love of books and reading, but also to their ability to engage in conversation, sharing opinions and ideas.
For more information about our monthly family focus endeavors, check out the post two below this one!
Dylan shared a little about Diary of a Wimpy kid. He's actually a "better" reader than this, but I'm letting them go with what they want in the moment. Reading is reading, right? My son David is working on his second Harry Potter book, while Dad is making his way through Telling Lies, a book about detecting deception. I chimed in about my first Stephen King novel, 11/22/63.
This week, we're each supposed to bring along and share a passage from our books and tell what impacted us or stood out about these. For my boys, it's a venture into new territory but I'm hopeful it will add to not only their love of books and reading, but also to their ability to engage in conversation, sharing opinions and ideas.
For more information about our monthly family focus endeavors, check out the post two below this one!
Friday, January 13, 2012
my mom's tortillas
My mother rolled her way out of the picking fields when she was about 12 years old. Her large family, along with extended relatives and fellow migrant workers, spent harvesting time in Indiana each year. Of course, this disrupted school and she later had to earn her GED, but that was life and she didn't have many choices. And while they did work in the north, there was no shortage of heat and discomfort when working to gather tomatoes.
So when her father told her to get into the kitchen one afternoon and start making lunch, she happily obliged, got to rolling what have truly become her famous homemade flour tortillas, and she never looked back.
Decades later, she would tell me this story when -- while waiting anxiously to top a fresh-from-the-comal tortilla with stick butter -- I asked just how she managed to make the most perfect tortillas in the world.
This story is the basis for many other stories I want to pass down and along from my mother. Stories of how her life, in a much simpler time with much less opportunity, molded and shaped her into the woman she is... a strong, generous, orderly and gracious woman. As she likes to remind us, her mother and father were not "educated," but they taught her a thing or two about manners, cleanliness and social awareness. First thing that comes to mind from her varied list of one-liners: "Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?"
And so when we visit Mom or she comes to Austin (although she has so very much to offer as a person and she gives it freely), unless there is that obvious aroma of heaven-on-earth lingering in the air, the unspoken question lurking around the house somewhere is usually something along the lines of, "Are there any of Mom's tortillas?"
So when her father told her to get into the kitchen one afternoon and start making lunch, she happily obliged, got to rolling what have truly become her famous homemade flour tortillas, and she never looked back.
Decades later, she would tell me this story when -- while waiting anxiously to top a fresh-from-the-comal tortilla with stick butter -- I asked just how she managed to make the most perfect tortillas in the world.
This story is the basis for many other stories I want to pass down and along from my mother. Stories of how her life, in a much simpler time with much less opportunity, molded and shaped her into the woman she is... a strong, generous, orderly and gracious woman. As she likes to remind us, her mother and father were not "educated," but they taught her a thing or two about manners, cleanliness and social awareness. First thing that comes to mind from her varied list of one-liners: "Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?"
And so when we visit Mom or she comes to Austin (although she has so very much to offer as a person and she gives it freely), unless there is that obvious aroma of heaven-on-earth lingering in the air, the unspoken question lurking around the house somewhere is usually something along the lines of, "Are there any of Mom's tortillas?"
Wednesday, January 11, 2012
family focus 2012
For 2012, my family and I are embarking on new territories by way of structured chance. At the beginning of each month, we'll draw a focus theme out of a hat (or bowl or cupped hands; whatever). For that month, this theme/activity/challenge will be our family focus. I put together 12 things we either haven't done together as a family or are new to most or all of us. It seemed like a fun way to stay connected and grow and learn together in a year that some spook-theorists claim will be our last on earth!
There isn't a formula for all of these, though I have some fun ideas for some. We left off music, hiking, movies, travel, sports, and other things that already have our family interest in a big way.
We're starting the year with "Family Book Club." We've met to discuss what books we're reading and what we enjoy about these books and reading in general. And we have an assignment for our next meeting: bring a passage from your selected reading and share it with the group; tell why you like the passage as well as what you take from it.
Here are the other 11 monthly focuses we'll be taking on in 2012:
* Fashion and Style (Didn't I say we're venturing into new territories?)
* Survival / Emergency (My husband will no doubt be a big help with this one.)
* Facing Fears (Should be interesting!)
* Outdoor Adventures (Because we all love the outdoors already, this should be a way to enjoy them in new or less explored ways... kayaking, camping, gardening?)
* Food / Cooking (My son always wants to help in the kitchen and because I'm not a big fan, I always manage to wiggle out of anything that prolongs the task of cooking. Maybe I'll be inspired!)
* Art (This will specifically focus on the arts we don't participate in or experience, namely drawing, painting and sculpting.)
* Family 5K (There are some specifics here. We walked/jogged our first 5K as a family this past summer in Del Mar, CA. but the challenge here would be to choose a 5K and then focus on training to RUN it.)
* New Places (Not so much just new cities, but also the many places we've not been to as a family in our own city. This could include restaurants, shops, museums, parks, etc.)
* New Sports (We love our baseball and football around here. Ideally, we'll try some new things -- tennis, anyone? -- and maybe find a new love or two.)
* Website, Blogging, Networking (Like it or not, it's the future's wave and we'll possibly create a family site for documenting our life, like monthly family focus time!)
* The Beatles (While this is a music theme, I decided it's an outright shame that ALL FOUR of us have somehow managed to get this far in life with little to no knowledge about the Fab Four. And we call ourselves music fans!)
I've heard from a number of friends that our long family road trips have been inspiring! Perhaps this little at-home way to adventure can encourage you to seek out new paths for you and your loved ones in 2012.
There isn't a formula for all of these, though I have some fun ideas for some. We left off music, hiking, movies, travel, sports, and other things that already have our family interest in a big way.
We're starting the year with "Family Book Club." We've met to discuss what books we're reading and what we enjoy about these books and reading in general. And we have an assignment for our next meeting: bring a passage from your selected reading and share it with the group; tell why you like the passage as well as what you take from it.
Here are the other 11 monthly focuses we'll be taking on in 2012:
* Fashion and Style (Didn't I say we're venturing into new territories?)
* Survival / Emergency (My husband will no doubt be a big help with this one.)
* Facing Fears (Should be interesting!)
* Outdoor Adventures (Because we all love the outdoors already, this should be a way to enjoy them in new or less explored ways... kayaking, camping, gardening?)
* Food / Cooking (My son always wants to help in the kitchen and because I'm not a big fan, I always manage to wiggle out of anything that prolongs the task of cooking. Maybe I'll be inspired!)
* Art (This will specifically focus on the arts we don't participate in or experience, namely drawing, painting and sculpting.)
* Family 5K (There are some specifics here. We walked/jogged our first 5K as a family this past summer in Del Mar, CA. but the challenge here would be to choose a 5K and then focus on training to RUN it.)
* New Places (Not so much just new cities, but also the many places we've not been to as a family in our own city. This could include restaurants, shops, museums, parks, etc.)
* New Sports (We love our baseball and football around here. Ideally, we'll try some new things -- tennis, anyone? -- and maybe find a new love or two.)
* Website, Blogging, Networking (Like it or not, it's the future's wave and we'll possibly create a family site for documenting our life, like monthly family focus time!)
* The Beatles (While this is a music theme, I decided it's an outright shame that ALL FOUR of us have somehow managed to get this far in life with little to no knowledge about the Fab Four. And we call ourselves music fans!)
I've heard from a number of friends that our long family road trips have been inspiring! Perhaps this little at-home way to adventure can encourage you to seek out new paths for you and your loved ones in 2012.
Tuesday, January 3, 2012
just call me Mrs. Clean...
I've always been interested in birth order studies. Recently, I've had some clarity about my own complexities because I've come to discover that I have typical characteristics of both a baby of the family (which I am) and an only child or firstborn (because my sisters are six and eight years older than me). This is why I am competitive and seek to please people, which flies in sometimes direct opposition to my free spirit and often times laid back approach to people and old-fashioned rules.
But one thing about me that I cannot shake -- that I dare not be rid of -- is a love for cleanliness and order. I married someone who isn't naturally inclined toward these traits, and I've benefited from this. He has taught me to ease up and relax when my controlling nature would rather harp on something just a little bit longer. Having two young boys, I've taught myself to enjoy being with them rather than spending every waking hour cleaning up after them (though sometimes, I regress).
Still, I love to clean! And damn proud of it! Granted, I can get lazy at times. Sometimes I wish I had a maid come and do it all (I think I haven't committed to this for several reasons, one being that I actually, truly do love to clean my own house myself!); other times, I pray that at least one man in this house would take after me in this department! The older I get, the more I tend to want things "just so" when it comes to cleaning... I want no interruptions, I want to clean MY way and as I choose (so I spend an hour on a spice cabinet... who cares?), and I want to do it myself and usually alone without someone else's "help" (because if I waste time telling you how to do it, trust me, that is no help!).
Today, I started to tackle my less than spotless house. The dust has been berating for weeks, while the carpet... OH, that blasted carpet. I am counting the days until we can pull it up once and for all! My boys are going to get their own room each, if only for a sense of order when it comes to their toys, books and clothes. I love my sons, but I'm done with this house being a community-wide dwelling place. Sure it's OUR house, OUR home... but their stuff shouldn't occupy lots of space in the dining room, sun room, living room AND their bathroom, playroom and bedroom. Enough is enough! They are older now, not babies anymore. Time to contain their belongings to basically one space each (and a shared bathroom), PERIOD!
My task is a big one... try as I might, I get virtually no help in this department. My children rarely remember on their own to put things back from whence they came. My husband -- a hard worker AND student -- does well to keep up with the weekly trash and occasional car and outdoor task; he also likes to cook on occasion. Laundry, dishes, all basic and deep cleaning, picking up, organizing of any kind, etc. falls on me and me alone. And I am so grateful that I love to clean.
So, I'm no cook. I don't craft. My skills are not in the shopping or decorating or PTA arenas. But oh, how I love to clean and care for and organize my home! I'm not especially fond of cleaning toilets, but there is a real sense of accomplishment and satisfaction in taking care of what is mine and what I've been entrusted to care for, even if it means I eventually have to do it (at some level or another) all over again tomorrow!
But one thing about me that I cannot shake -- that I dare not be rid of -- is a love for cleanliness and order. I married someone who isn't naturally inclined toward these traits, and I've benefited from this. He has taught me to ease up and relax when my controlling nature would rather harp on something just a little bit longer. Having two young boys, I've taught myself to enjoy being with them rather than spending every waking hour cleaning up after them (though sometimes, I regress).
Still, I love to clean! And damn proud of it! Granted, I can get lazy at times. Sometimes I wish I had a maid come and do it all (I think I haven't committed to this for several reasons, one being that I actually, truly do love to clean my own house myself!); other times, I pray that at least one man in this house would take after me in this department! The older I get, the more I tend to want things "just so" when it comes to cleaning... I want no interruptions, I want to clean MY way and as I choose (so I spend an hour on a spice cabinet... who cares?), and I want to do it myself and usually alone without someone else's "help" (because if I waste time telling you how to do it, trust me, that is no help!).
Today, I started to tackle my less than spotless house. The dust has been berating for weeks, while the carpet... OH, that blasted carpet. I am counting the days until we can pull it up once and for all! My boys are going to get their own room each, if only for a sense of order when it comes to their toys, books and clothes. I love my sons, but I'm done with this house being a community-wide dwelling place. Sure it's OUR house, OUR home... but their stuff shouldn't occupy lots of space in the dining room, sun room, living room AND their bathroom, playroom and bedroom. Enough is enough! They are older now, not babies anymore. Time to contain their belongings to basically one space each (and a shared bathroom), PERIOD!
My task is a big one... try as I might, I get virtually no help in this department. My children rarely remember on their own to put things back from whence they came. My husband -- a hard worker AND student -- does well to keep up with the weekly trash and occasional car and outdoor task; he also likes to cook on occasion. Laundry, dishes, all basic and deep cleaning, picking up, organizing of any kind, etc. falls on me and me alone. And I am so grateful that I love to clean.
So, I'm no cook. I don't craft. My skills are not in the shopping or decorating or PTA arenas. But oh, how I love to clean and care for and organize my home! I'm not especially fond of cleaning toilets, but there is a real sense of accomplishment and satisfaction in taking care of what is mine and what I've been entrusted to care for, even if it means I eventually have to do it (at some level or another) all over again tomorrow!
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